Week 7 Recap: Winless No More

Two teams are firmly planted at the top after the dust settles after Week 7. With that in mind, the league is scattered with quality opponents. As seen below in the standings, Josh and Nick are atop their respective divisions while Dom and Chris both sit at 1-6. Since Dom is at 1-6, it means only one thing. Dom won an actual matchup. The nightmare is over (for now)! After two massive performances from Jay Ajayi and Jeremy Hill, he is finally on the board in 2016. Granted, he's well behind the 8-ball for a potential playoff spot, but he is hoping to make the most improbable of runs in league history. 

As we once again take a look at the standings, a few things jump out. First the resiliency of Will Gavin is duly noted. Constantly riddled with bad luck, he has been able to compete due to his duo of strong RB's (Anderson and Michael), AJ Green and other role players. If Carson Palmer returns to form, we can expect WG to be back in the playoffs in 2016. As for Joe and Brian, two of the league's preseason favorites, they are currently dealing with 3-4 records, in the 7th and 8th spots respectively. However, they have lineups that could certainly knock off a top seed if they stayed in those seeds for the rest of the season. Don't see it happening but you never know. The current bottom 4 features, Aaron, Chris, Chreeyusz and Dom. Chreeyusz and Aaron just can't see to build off any momentum they've gained this season and have their work cut out for them if they're going to get into the playoffs. With a convincing win, Vinnie has the 6th seed and is currently trending upwards with a few key additions starting to perform. This is a dangerous first-round matchup for any team, currently projected to face Dave in Round 1.

GAME OF THE WEEK

(3-4) Dirty Birds, Inc. - 110.9

(6-1) Brule's Rules - 151

All the smack talk that was sent in Nick's direction was kindly addressed by a stampede of majestic Colts. Before Brian knew what hit him, the Colts had finished dragging their collective nuts all over his team's chin to the tune of nearly 110 points. Andrew Luck was able to find Frank Gore, Jack Doyle and TY Hilton each for a touchdown and the rout was on. Isaiah Crowell performed in a spot start and with the strong pickup of Giants D, Nick finds himself at 6-1 with some nice separation from the division (two games over Will to be exact). Obviously, the team's success is directly correlated from Indianapolis but for now, it is working and he is 6-1. Jordy Nelson produced a rare dud but Larry Fitzgerald continues to provide constant production. With Tyler Eifert and Doug Martin returning to full health, feel free to steer clear of this squad. Unless the Colts' team plane vanishes out of thin air. "Great team win. Could have been better, but that's why we practice. We're centering our focus on the right goals and are halfway to achieving our main goal. Keyword is half. Lot of game left to be played and I'll be damned if we let a sliver of complacency sneak in now." Another tough test lies ahead for Nick as he faces his neighborhood-ally, EBDB BnB who is currently riding a 5-game winning streak.

Didn't go the way Brian had planned but thankfully this was a regular season matchup without much implication. Besides the bragging rights. However, there is still a chance these two teams will meet again in the postseason and the rematch will be as intense as usual. Julio Jones had himself a ball-game but it was simply not enough to keep pace with the Colts. Sitting three games behind Nick in the division, another crown may be out of reach but Brian is just worried about another shot at the real title. His team has the pieces to make another deep run but will he be able to sustain this output from his running backs in the later weeks? DeMarco Murray turned in another great performance while Jordan Howard's luster may have started to wear off with a dud against Green Bay. Gronk at full-health certainly makes things easier and if Matt Ryan continues to play at this level, there's nothing that can't be achieved this year. Next week, he looks to take a step back in the right direction against a struggling Team New Year.

(5-2) EBDB BnB - 114.6
(3-4) Team Ruthless - 87.7
"If Joe's kicker didn't beat his wife and my defense didn't play like the '85 Bears, we'd be having a different conversation right now." But they DIDN'T Dave! And because of that, you're 5-2 and only game behind the overall number one seed. One of the most impressive streaks in recent memory, after the defending champ fell into an 0-2 hole, no one panicked. Close, but no actual panicking took place. What did take place, was a stretch of great play from the reigning champ. Dave wanted to remind everyone who's top dog and it's hard to argue against. If he can pull off another win against Nick this week, he will have the league's full attention. However, he'll have to do it without Todd Gurley and a muddled QB situation, where Blake Bortles and Carson Wentz can't seem to figure it out when they're starting. Can Wentz or Bortles shine in their respective prime-time matchups and win the psuedo-QB battle currently taking place within the organization?

The Josh Brown saga is over in New York but apparently not with Team Ruthless. After some serious ignorance on behalf of Joe's staff, Brown was still employed by Team Ruthless going into Sunday's game. However, he wasn't on the Giants, therefore not even in the same country as the Giants (thankfully, for the women of London). Regardless, an early 0 posted by his vacant kicker set the tone for a miserable weekend for Joe. More than half of his players scored under 5 points and Dave ran away with another victory. Bell, Evans and Brees were the long bright spots and any other contributions from the rest of the team could have made this a close matchup. Back to the drawing board again for Joe who severely missed the services of Shady McCoy. Assuming he's back for next week, he'll hope to get back to .500 against the now 1-6 Shitty Beatles. After just completing a trade together, let's see who truly got the best of the deal. Joe however will be without his prized possession, Le'Veon Bell. 

(1-6) The Shitty Beatles - 120.8
(4-3) Start the Carr - 94.9
Maybe it IS just a clever name. The Beatles have won their first game of the season and it only took them 7 weeks, Dom, who came into the season as a preseason pick for the playoffs, lost his best player early and was never able to recover. Naturally, he began to stockpile draft picks and now he is finally starting to experience some production out of the diminished returns he received. However, these "throw-ins" in his trades aren't as bad they seem to be. Jay Ajayi was a late addition to the Edelman trade and once again went over 200 yards in a win over the Bills. Jeremy Hill, a throw in for the Drew Brees trade, went for nearly 200 yards on just 9 carries and that was enough to propel Dom to victory. Drew Brees was eventually flipped for Randall Cobb and Delanie Walker, also posting their best games of the season. Maybe Dom had the right idea all along? Hoping to start a legitimate winning streak, he'll face Joe, a team he supplied with players over the past few weeks. Let's see who truly won this Drew Brees trade.

All that work crafting a meme to show me that I was "wrong" about writing about how were an underdog to Dom could have been allocated to something else. After an upset win the week before over Nick, Ben was not able to sweep the Caputo's to improve to 5-2. His team underwhelmed with Terrance West falling back down to earth and waiver wire darling Cameron Meredith scoring 2 points (1.7). Spencer Ware turned in another great game but Ben has been waiting to unleash Jamaal Charles full time and with the continued performance of Ware, he must tread lightly on a weekly basis. This weekend, he'll face Will in a battle for Ohio, as Will is a resident of the Buckeye State as of Friday. Whoever wins this matchup will improve to 5-3 and can hopefully have the inside track at a playoff spot. Neither team made the postseason last year and will be going all-out to get a win this week. Here's what Ben had to say regarding his loss to Dom, "Very sad week for Start the Carr. Props to Dom for a tremendous week. 'The luck's just not swinging our way. We're not getting those breaks right now' - Hue Jackson".

(6-1) TY Beanies - 122.9
(1-6) Schenectady Schmeckles - 96.4
Another walk in the park for Josh. With another win, he inches closer to already clinching a playoff spot once again but he has his sights aimed much higher. The combination of David Johnson, Melvin Gordon and Gio Bernard proved to be too much for Chris. Josh's team is rolling right now and barring a major injury and Cam plays up to snuff, he'll be the odds-on favorite to win this entire thing. Alshon Jeffrey's inconsistency will be something to monitor going forward, as will new addition Travis Kelce not being able to make an impact. However, he is making an impact with the ladies. Tune in Wednesday nights at 10 on E! to watch Catching Kelce, as the star tight end looks for love from a group of willing females. (Disclaimer) Watched one episode and it was highly entertaining. Think of a less classy Bachelor with football themes. Anyways, Josh takes on Aaron this week and with the Steelers on a bye, should be another favorable matchup for the Beanies. A win gets him to 7-1, his best start ever and a lock on a high playoff spot.

Chris knew this week's matchup wouldn't be easy and by-golly, he was right. This one never really had a chance even after OBJ and Alshon posted duds. Aaron Rodgers posted a strong game, certainly a positive sign going forward, but it was the rest of the team that brought Chris down. His team has been decimated by injuries and when players like Terrelle Pryor aren't able to produce, he is in big trouble. LeGarrette Blount continues to be a driving force but he is all alone at the running back spot. With Eddie Lacy out and Arian Foster retired, he is down to two runnings back. One of them, is Knile Davis. Something must be done if he wants to compete the rest of the way. Facing Vinnie this week, it is an essential must-win game from here on out if he wants to return to the postseason. Expect some roster shuffling from Chris this week.

(4-3) Hogan Knows Best - 118.7
(3-4) Why You Pee On My Car? - 94.4
As mentioned above, Will has really been one of the surprises this season. When one of his two keepers went down early, many would have liked to write him off, especially after the injury to Thomas Rawls. Thankfully, CJ Anderson and handcuff Christine Michael have aided AJ Green to a 4-3 record. Free agent pickup Jamison Crowder continues to have an outstanding season, remaining penciled into the flex position on a weekly basis at this point. Carson Palmer is still shaking off the brain rust from that gruesome concussion and once he's back to 2015 form, this team is ready to finally win their first-ever franchise game as an organization. In all Will's years, he has never won a playoff game and he hopes to end that streak this instant. Only Chris Casey and Dom are the other owners who have yet to accomplish this feat in Slushie Sunday history.

Thankfully for Aaron, Marcus Mariota didn't snap his legs once he was entered into his lineup. The Flyin' Hawaiian actually played quite well on short notice but the rest of his lineup, did not. Surprisingly, in a move of solidarity, Antonio Brown was left on the bench with his good from Ben Roethlisberger, forcing Mike Wallace to start. Wallace had a strong game but the presence of Antonio Brown may have helped more. At least for Aaron, the QB stayed healthy but this week he'll be without AB84 in a huge matchup against Josh. These two have traded shots at one another all year and this should be a hotly-contested matchup even with Aaron's team banged up. Tevin Coleman also looks to be doubtful for Sunday. Aaron will definitely need to do some work on the waiver wire to pull off the huge upset. A loss would put him at 3-5 and on the outside of the current playoff picture. A win would give him impressive wins over Josh and Brian in the same season. Currently, Nick is the only one to accomplish this feat (humblebrag).

(3-4) Team New Year - 87.2
(3-4) Kissing Suzy Kolber - 127
A great bounceback win for a team on the brink. After a hot start to the season and some notable trades, Vinnie seems to have found his footing with an impressive victory over Chreeyusz. Team New Year may not have put up much of a fight but it must have been comforting for Vinnie to have a win in-hand by the afternoon games. Tom Brady is in rare form (shocking) and Matt Forte dialed up another huge performance to save Vinnie's and the Jets' seasons. The New Orleans duo of Cooks and Ingram have been lighting it up of late while Brandon Lafell, Kenny Stills and Ty Montgomery posted huge numbers sitting on the bench. After not having much depth, Vinnie certainly has made up for it via trades and the waiver wire. Martellus Bennett's run may have come to an end but if he can find a stable tight end, we're looking at a dangerous team to face later in the season. Holding the tiebreaker over Brian and Chreeyusz helps as well, as they all currently sit at 3-4 after seven weeks. In hopes of returning to .500, he'll take on his Upstate NY contemporary, Chris Casey in a battle for "The Lake". Both teams swapped QB's earlier this year and with each toting favorable matchups, expect some fireworks this weekend.

After all the smack talk and confidence from playing Dom last week, Chreeyusz laid an egg against Vinnie in an attempt to get back over .500. Chris can't seem to get any consistency from his team. Jameis has done a fine job filling in for Russell Wilson but Jarvis Landry and Allen Robinson (mainly, Allen Robinson) have yet to post huge games that he's been accustom to. Not keeping Mike Evans doesn't look great now but he still totes two of the best young receivers in the game, paired with Stefon Diggs. Once again, his running backs shit the bed as Matt Jones and Jerick McKinnon combined for less than 10 points. Thankfully, Jonathan Stewart is off bye and is hoping to create a spark for this roster as Landry is now on bye this weekend. He'll face Brian in another tough matchup, hoping to pull off a huge upset.